Up until last week, I was the type of person who hates the night. I would sleep late, numb my brain with evening work or with TV series until I drop dead. In the morning, I would wake up all tight with a light feeling of stress. I would move on with another day working hard, no time to stop and think. Between my work and my kids, there was no much space for anything else consistent.
The night never did it for me. I love sleeping during the day, under the daylight. During week-ends that’s my small treat.
Since I started the MKMMA, most of the evenings, I need one hour and a half to complete the reading, the sitting and visualization. Often, two hours are not enough when there is writing and blogging to do. So, I had to stop the evening work and the TV. Hey! I want to keep my scholarship 🙂
What changed? One morning of last week, I woke up and realised that the morning feeling was not the same as usual. It didn’t hit me until early this week, when I got aware that indeed that old feeling was not there. What old feeling? I don’t know the name but I know when it is there for waking up with it for so many years. I mix of light fear, anguish and stress. In the past, I tried yoga, relaxation, essential oil and all kind of stuff to overcome it but it didn’t do. I gave up long ago and settled to live with it.
What happened? The combination of the readings with enthusiasm and the ‘let it go’ sitting exercise. That’s what did it. I think. And the consistency of the reading. Every morning of this week I checked my feeling waking up (through the observer’s eye like Mark says). For sure. It’s gone. I confirm. It’s gone. Guess what! now, I read with even more enthusiasm 🙂
It is a small change but maybe for me, it could be the change I needed.
Peace be the journey within 🙂